Mission Reports
by Lunatic of a Third Kind
Summary: What happens on the dispatch missions, anyway? This is a little series detailing the adventures of a few members of Clan Nutsy when they get sent off alone for some noble cause. Plans for an ongoing plot, rated T for no reason other than my paranoia.


I wrote this quite a while ago... so now I'm hoping to rekindle my inspiration for it. Y'know, maybe write a little series about ol' Clan Nutsy. A thoroughly disjointed one, sure, but one nonetheless.

* * *

Edwina watched as a Veira in Summoner's garb walked into her house. "So you're the one Clan Nutsy sent to help me out?" The Veira nodded nonchalantly while she looked around. It was a small enough house...How could she NOT find the book?  
Shaking her head, she looked to Edwina, waiting for what she should do. It was HER house, after all. The ginger-haired human looked clueless a moment, then asked, "What's your name, anyway? I can't just call you, 'Person from Clan Nutsy'." 

Giving Edwina an odd look, the Veira walked past Edwina to the table in the entry room. Picking up a piece of paper, the Veira wrote, _I'm mute._

"Wait..." Edwina said, reading the paper, "If you're mute, how are you a Summoner?"

The Summoner ignored the question, and after waving her left hand in a circle, a flash of light heralded Carbuncle. Carbuncle must have acted as the Veira's voice, for a few moments later it said (in a strangely squeaky tone) "Ellah says don't worry about it and she wants to know where to look for your book. A book? Ooh, is it magic?" The little yellow furry thing flew in circles around Edwina's head, annoying her to no end as 'Ellah' started to look for the book again.

"I'd guess it'd be in either the attic's rafters or the basement's, eh...basement. That's the only places I couldn't get to." Ellah shook her head (if she could talk, Edwina bet she'd mutter something about humans being the mascots for all mortal stupidity) and got out her staff (a beautiful thing, carved to look like two snakes entwined together, hissing at each other at the top) and started towards the basement. "Ellah has had bad experiences with basements," Carbuncle whispered from behind Edwina, "I'll uh...just go look in the rafters!" Carbuncle flew for the attic as fast as possible. Obviously, Ellah wasn't the only one with basement problems...

The two of them trudging through the illogically huge basement, Edwina amused herself by asking Ellah questions and trying to determine the answer from her facial expressions. Most of the time it was annoyed. Whenever Carbuncle was mentioned, it was just a total robotic expression, and when asked about Clan Nutsy, particularly it's third-in-command, Ocon...

"Hey! You're blushing!"  
This comment earned Edwina a thunk on the head with Ellah's staff.

* * *

The shadows the two had just passed by started to swirl together into some dark creature with yellow eyes. "The summoner," It hissed, "and without her little guardian. Pity, I so wanted to rend it to shreds." The creature faded away once again, leaving behind Edwina's diary, hidden under the book was a small magic circle. 

Ellah sensed something was off, and turned around to where they'd just passed by. There, laying innocently on the ground, was Edwina's book. Edwina saw this and ran to grab it, but Ellah still thought something was wrong...As soon as Edwina picked up the book, dark light spewed forth from a magic circle that had been under the book. Ellah grabbed Edwina's arm and pulled her down to the ground right before five hawks made of black energy swooped through where her head would've been.

"What was that?!" Edwina demanded, but Ellah ignored her in favor of pulling her out of the way of another wave of hawks. Edwina was about to ask again (funny that she'd forgotten the little fact that Ellah couldn't respond) when one of the hawks almost dove into her face.

Pushing Edwina out of the way, Ellah swung her staff at the circle where all the hawks where coming from. Ice formed around it, making the rest of the birds dissipate. Suddenly, the ice shattered, and the circle turned into a big mass of swirling shadows. The shadows began to take form, until the creature before them appeared to be a monstrous black Cerberus. Glaring at the great dark dog, Ellah put away her staff in favor of a huge katana covered in runes and shining with holy energy. The creature seemed to snort in amusement, but not so much when the Summoner glowed with a strange blue light. It even looked a little frightened.

You better be afraid when someone's getting ready to Ultima Mash you into next year.

After the initial explosion, the big Cerberus-thing was now a...well, a little tiny goblinish thing. It said something unintelligible before disappearing.

* * *

"Wait," Ocon mumbled in an annoyed voice, reading the mission report Ellah had given him again, "I want to know exactly how evil overlords messed up Edwina's basement. Wasn't the mission just to find a diary?" 

Both Ellah and Carbuncle shrugged.

"Well, no more dispatch missions for _you..._"

As Ellah left with Carbuncle following as usual, Ocon put her mission report next to the original information for the mission:

_"Mission No. 164: Diary Dilemma _("Last time I let Nono come up with these mission names.")  
_My little brothers hid  
my diary somewhere in my  
house. I need you to find  
it before--gasp--my parents my  
parents do!!!  
Edwina, Concerned Girl"_

* * *

_Bonus Scene: Meanwhile, in the attic..._

"Eeek!"

Carbuncle dove behind a box when a spider came swinging down where Carbuncle had been a moment before. Quite a vicious spider, mind you. It had murder in it's eyes.

Except this was around the fifth time that had happened. This attic must have been some kind of spider insane asylum. Obviously, it was much more dangerous here than in the basement.

About ten more near-death spider encounters later, Carbuncle started to suspect the same spider was what kept swooping down like a demon creature. It either had nothing better to do, or this attic was evil and made anyone who wandered into it get lost and go in circles until they finally died.

Or it just made them repeat the same moment in time over and over and over until they lost it.

Either way, Carbuncle resolved to avoid attics from now on. And was that Ellah walking up?

Yes, it was. Finally, escape from this terrible, terrible attic of doom and crazy spiders.


End file.
